October 2:
Today my life began. My parents do not know it yet. I am
as small as the pollen
of a flower, but it is "I" already. I am a girl.
I will have blonde hair and blue eyes. Nearly everything is settled
already, even that I shall love kittens and birds.
October 19:
I have grown a little, but I am still too small to do anything
by myself. My mother does everything for me, although she still does not
know that she is carrying me under her heart. But I am a real person, just
as a crumb of bread is still real bread. My mother exists, and I do too.
October 23:
My mouth is just now beginning to open. Just think, in a year
or so I'll be laughing, and later I'll start to talk. My first word will be "Mama."
October 25:
Today my heart began to beat. It will beat softly for the
rest of my life, never stopping. After many years it will tire, and stop,
and then I shall die.
November 2:
I am growing continually. My arms and legs are taking shape,
but I must wait a long time before these tiny legs will raise me to my
mother's arms; before these little arms will be able to conquer the earth
and befriend people.
November 12:
Tiny fingers are beginning to form on my hands. How small
they are. One day
I'll stroke my mother's hair and tell her how nice she is.
November 20:
Only today the doctor told my mother that I'm living here
under her heart. How happy she must be! Are you happy, mother?
November 25:
My mother and father are probably thinking about a name
for me. They don't
even know that I am a little girl, so they are
probably calling me "Andy." But I want to be called Barbara. I am
growing so big.
December 10:
My hair is growing. It is as bright and shiny as the sun.
I wonder what my mother's hair looks like.
December 13:
My eyes are almost fully developed, although the lids are
still shut. When mother brings me into the world it will be full of
sunshine and overflowing with flowers.
Ihave never seen a flower you
know, but more than anything I want to see my mother.
What do you look like, mother?
December 24:
My fingers and toes are fully formed. Even my nails are
beginning to develop. I have my own unique fingerprints.
December 26:
I wonder if my mother hears the delicate beat of my heart?
Some children are born with sickly hearts, and then the gentle fingers of
their doctor perform miracles to make them healthy. But my heart is healthy.
It beats so evenly: tup-tup, tup-tup.
You shall have a healthy daughter, mother.
December 28:
Today my mother and our doctor ended my life.
Please forgive them Jesus.
Recommended - Late Term Abortion
Recommended - First Nine Months of Life
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A Little Girl's First Diary